Only I would meet the only guy on CL who wants to court.
I’m okay with it for now. Being courted is completely new to me, and extremely pleasant and he does seem okay with goodnight kisses. The man says the sweetest things at surprising times. I keep waiting for that shoe to drop; to hear, “you’re so great, but…” Instead I get, “I just loved spending time with you tonight. It meant a lot to me to just sit quietly together while I read.” The compliments are so frequent, and proffered so sincerely, that I’m a little overwhelmed. He’s already asked me out for next Monday! He wants to go out again on Saturday! He’s tall, dark and handsome. He’s gentle and thoughtful. I can’t stop thinking about him. I think I may actually feel hope!
I’ve sunk to an all new low! Craigslist personals!!!! NOOOOOO!!!!!!
But, yes, dear friends. I answered an M4W ad on CL. Not one of those nasty “CE’s” or a “CE” posing as an honest-to-god M4W. Because that is some Scary Shit. I don’t know what possessed me but I responded to an ad. This chap seems so earnest and nice so you know he’s a serial
killer dater. Prolly. He’s a bit younger so maybe he just isn’t as well-versed as I where online dating is concerned. I don’t know if his lack of experience will work for or against me… Lets all send extra nice karma in the direction of “for”. ‘kay?
So, what makes me think he’s a newbie? Because all it took was one semi-descriptive backgrounder of an email and a b/w headshot (a la the Bunny’s/Cita’s new Mac) for him to call me “mesmerizing”. Now, don’t you think for a single second that I disagree with this assessment, but methinks he came to that (so totes correct) conclusion way too soon. Only the inexperienced online dater makes this sort of
mistake assumption mistake.
At the same time, how endearing! It reminds me of those first heady days of my first online date! Now, that boy was experienced and he had the body of a minor greek god – perfect Davids. (Why didn’t I sleep with that boy when I had the chance? Dammit!) I think the reason I haven’t hung this redonkulousness up is because those first dates with that first online guy were so very pleasant. The few decent dates or friendships I’ve formed from this poorly-planned social experiment make up for all the losers. So far. It would be so nice to be excited about someone based on an innocent email message instead of asking myself, “What’s wrong with this guy? What is his game?”
I didn’t realize it till tonight, but I think I’m finished with casual sex. Or, at least I’m done with casual sex with most men. I want love. I want to be, at least, slightly swept off my feet. I want someone to like me more than just for the pretty. I want someone to “get me”. I want to be worth the wait (all three dates). I think I may be asking for too much. I think I might rather be alone than accept anything less.